Tag: Hate

Hatred is easy.

​We the people have the power to show love and kindness. With the power of music, the power of art, the power of writing, the power of small gestures. A single smile, or a simple “are you okay?” can change the world for someone. 

Trump supporters are being hateful, Hillary supporters are being hateful. When are the people going to realize that hate has done nothing but sow the seeds of discord even further into our hearts? Love. Acceptance. Being open minded. Humility. THESE are the things that will win our country back. Not killing each other over a difference of opinion. Not killing each other over a difference in race, sexual orientation, gender…. It’s going to take all of us. Sadly, we the people have forgotten love. Sadly, love has been replaced. Not with hate. Fear. We have been taught to fear our brothers and sisters. We’ve been taught to fear difference, because different must be bad. Kindness has been replaced with distrust, which leads to more fear. We’ve been taught that if someone isn’t agreeing with us, they are against us, and being against us is bad. We’re paranoid, and we’re scared, and we all feel alone.

 I choose to stand with homosexuals, I choose to stand with people of color. I choose to stand with white people. I choose to stand with straight people, transgender people. I choose to stand with Muslims, Buddhists, pagans, wiccans, Hindus, Christians, atheists, so forth. WE THE PEOPLE. CAN CHOOSE. LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE OVER HATRED. 

Teach me so I can learn! Show me the beauty of the world through your eyes. Spread joy and laughter, not blood of fellow human beings.

Our country was founded on freedom of oppression so that WE could all live the American dream. History has not been kind to our ancestors, no matter the race. I choose to educate myself so that I can avoid making the same mistakes my ancestors and my elders did, and do. I choose not to let the past rule me and my decisions. “This is the way it’s always been, so it’s the way it has to be.” BY WHOSE RULES?! No. I refuse to accept that. I refuse to accept that it will always be this way. I refuse to accept that we will always hate one another. Not if we all choose to do otherwise. 

Right now hate is winning. Fear is winning. Right now, YOU HAVE A CHOICE. I don’t care who is running this country because in the end, WE THE PEOPLE ARE THEIR BOSSES. WE THE PEOPLE HAVE THE POWER TO STOP ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING ANY POLITICIAN THROWS AT US. But we have to STOP. HATING. AND KILLING. EACH OTHER. 

Every single one of us has their own battles to fight. We’re all going through things. We’re all angry about something, we’re all scared about something. Every individual on earth is just as complex as the other. It makes no sense to judge someone by something they cannot help. Judge by character, by observation. Not by what a label tells you. PEOPLE ARE NOT SOUP CANS.

So what’s it going to be, people of the world? Let history continue to repeat in a timeless loop of death, depression, and fear? Or do we put our foot down and scream at the top of our lungs “WE THE PEOPLE OF EARTH HAVE HAD ENOUGH.”

Teach love. Teach respect. Teach kindness. Teach to be a trusting person, and teach to trust. It’s going to take us all. 

And believe me, if you see me in public and you ever feel afraid, ask and I will defend you. I will defend those who cannot speak, those who cannot reach out. Men, women, children, anyone. I stand with humanity.

We the people must vow from this moment forward to try and make a difference. One voice in a crowd is but a whisper, but put enough whispers together and they’ll hear our screams. Enough is enough. 

I’m Fine

As I lay my head down to the sleep,
The demons find a hole to creep
Inside my thoughts, chaos spinning
Memories long gone come back again.
The yelling, the screaming, the torture, the pain,
The lies, the betrayal, the embarrassment made,
Shadows I’ve been running from for most of my life pick the time I want peace to pounce and fight.
I claw at my skin because I can feel them crawling
Like ants trying to devour my soul,
I keep resisting them.
Even when I wake I catch them creeping inside
Forcing me to relive my deepest sins.
Remember that one time, and how everyone laughed?
You’re such a mistake, a fool, your time has come and passed.
Remember that other time you fell asleep with your tears?
Let’s relive that, and all your worst fears.
I lay my head down to sleep,
I pray the nightmares away will keep.

But you’re all smiles and all laughs. 
Your problems can’t be that bad, you’re over dramatic.
It could always be worse, my dear, don’t you know it?
Keep your head up high and don’t try to show it.
Don’t let them see the scars or hear your pain,
It’ll be worse next time, they’ll be back again.

I open my mouth to scream, but all I hear is silence.
On the outside I’m calm, but inside there’s violence.
I’m being torn apart now, but don’t worry about me.
The demons aren’t real, or so they tell me.
It’s all make believe, I just have to keep trying.
How can this not be real, can’t you see I’m dying?
Can’t you see my soul bleeding from my eyes?
Can’t you hear the lies when I whisper I’m fine?
Can’t you hear the lump form in my throat?

No tears, we get scared when you cry.
You’re so happy all the time, just grin and lie.

I’m tired of lying, I’m tired of fear.
I’m drowning in my pain, and with every tear
I shed when I’m trying to dream
Is pulling a piece of my heart out, but I silence my screams.

Give all that you can to everyone around.
Maybe filling the void for them will quiet the sound
Of the monsters hiding in your soul trying to get in.
Or you’ll dry up like a husk, and eventually give in
To the temptation to pick up the razorblades
And let the demons carve their names into your flesh.

Don’t worry about me, I’m fine, I promise.
The final breath that I scream will be my loudest.

Reasons Why I Hate Where I Live

I was born, and raised, in a small town in North Louisiana. As a child I was quite proud of that fact, and had no trouble boasting about it to anyone that would listen. I think back to those moments of childhood and shake my head. If only I knew then what I know now.

Living where I live adds many degrees of difficulty in my everyday life. For one, when I am having to fill out information on websites, and it asks what “county” I live in. Interesting fact for the day, Louisiana doesn’t have counties. We have parishes. There is no Bienville of Lincoln county.

When people hear about Louisiana, they automatically think of Cajuns, or more specifically, New Orleans. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve been asked about New Orleans. “How far are you from New Orleans?” “How badly was your home damaged in Katrina?” “Ooh so-and-so is playing in New Orleans, are you going?” There is more to Louisiana than just New Orleans. In fact, it is impossible for the entire state of Louisiana to live in New Orleans. Yes, I am mentioning it over and over again so perhaps you can understand MY frustrations.

No I do not own an alligator, and no I do not live in a swamp.

I do, however, know where to find a swamp.

The town that I live in, and have lived in for my entire life, has nada in regards to entertainment for people my age. The only malls that have anything worth buying are about 45 minutes in either direction. There’s Bonnie and Clyde, but that only happens once a month, or I’m not a big fan of the events they have staged there.

That’s another thing I hate about where I live. Bonnie and Clyde WERE NOT KILLED HERE. STOP IT. -deep breath-

There are so many celebrities that I wish to meet in my lifetime, so many that I want to get autographs from before I die. So many people that I’d love to just… shake their hands. There are so many bands that I want to watch play JUST for the sake of saying I did it!

But guess where they all go.

That’s right. If these bands, or celebrities, even so much as bother looking at Louisiana, they usually end up in New Orleans. I realize this is not the fault of the celebrity in question, or the band, it’s all about supply and demand. And Louisiana isn’t going to demand a lot of people I like, because they have nothing to do with God, the Government, NASCAR, Football, or Drinking Beer. You know, the five main religions of the south. Which brings me to my next point.

I am smack in the middle of the Bible Belt. I wouldn’t say we’re the belt buckle, but we’re probably close. Which means I am in the center of racism, homophobia, and bible thumping. Being different is not okay here. You’re supposed to fit into a certain mold, and if you do not fit such a mold, the system works against you.

I’m not saying this is true for everyone who lives in this state, or any of the other southern states. Obviously I’m an exception to the rule, so there must be others.

What I mean is, when I was in school I wore all black. I drew on my arm, and my clothes, I liked “gothic” stuff. As soon as I turned 18 I got my tongue pierced, and as soon as I turned 19 I got my lip pierced. I was dubbed the “trouble maker”, even if I was doing nothing more than sitting there reading a book. A lot of rules were made against the “gothic students”, whereas the cheerleaders or athletes could get away with whatever they chose.

I’ve had so many people come up to pray for me when I, again, was doing nothing more than sitting around reading a book. No kidding. I was actually in the mall, in the bookstore, just reading. I had Tripp pants on, my hair was dyed black, and I was reading a book. READING A BOOK. This woman walked up to me and asked for my name, and said she would pray for me in hopes that I would fix myself. Um. Excuse the fuck out of you, woman. Who the hell do you think you are, and since when did the “rules” not apply to you?

A really good friend of mine was once warned to stay away from me because I wore all black. That obviously makes me a devil worshiper. Again. Excuse the fuck out of you?

I am a nice, good person. I wear all black, and I’m quirky. Sometimes I misplace that filter between your mouth and brain that keeps you from saying things, and sometimes my shame is in the same hiding place. But I am a genuinely good person. I love helping people, and I love making others feel better. I’ve made mistakes, just like everyone else, but when you cut me I still bleed. It took a very VERY long time for me to get over worrying what people thought about me. Yes, I still wear all black. Mostly because I am TERRIBLE at matching clothes (ask my ex-husband if you don’t believe me), and black matches black every time!

Unless I’m killing your pets, or I’ve actually dragged you into the middle of a circle drawn in blood, do not accuse me of anything. I don’t even believe in the devil.

Anyway.

One thing I will say in defense of the south. Not everyone born here is an idiot. Our accents may make us talk a little slower, and our drawl might make us sound stupid, but I can guarantee you that is not the case. And seriously people, stop acting like you can do our accents better than us.

Stupid cast of True Blood. They sound like they’re from Alabama, not Louisiana. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE YOU KNOW.

-sigh-

The original point of all of this was pointing out the lack of celebrities and entertainment in this state, but with all things my brain decided it needed to rant. So back to my original point.

Neil Gaiman is doing a US Book Signing, the last one he’ll do. And guess what? I can’t go because there wasn’t enough of a demand.
I’ll never meet people like Jeaniene Frost, Laurell K. Hamilton, Tom Hiddleston, Matt Smith, Ville Valo etc.

I’ll never get to shake hands with Ozzy Osbourne.

And you know what? It sucks. All because I live in a backwoods little hick town.

Seriously. It sucks.

I know none of them will see this blog, and even if they did I’m sure this isn’t the first time they’ve heard this from a fan. But if I could meet these people face to face, I’d tell them simply this: You guys are a huge inspiration to me. I appreciate all the hard work and dedication that you do. You’ve all brought me out of a lot of hard, bad places, and you’ve made me realize that it’s okay to be different. Keep doing what you do, and I’ll keep loving you.

Now THAT is out of the way…What do you guys think of where you live? Is it better or worse?

Oh, and as a side note, I’ve been watching the views to see just how many people visit my blog, and I must say thank you to each and every one of you. I have to ask, though….Why am I so popular in Canada? AllTimeViews

Not that I’m complaining, of course. Just curious!